Why I am qualified for the Seattle Mariners GM position

Since the Seattle Mariners fired their General Manager Jack Zduriencik today, I would like to start an online petition for me, Joseph John Douglas Parkhill, to be the next GM of the Seattle Mariners. It's been one of my lifelong goals to work for the Mariners and I want this to become a reality because I love the Mariners and I care what happens to them. I know I have Autism and am not very social, but I sure know more about baseball than Jack Zduriencik & Bill Bavasi put together. For example, I know how to use advanced stats like Wins Above Replacement or WAR, which calculates a player’s total contribution to his team. For example, I calculated that, in his career, Felix Hernandez has a value of 49.7 WAR, meaning he has given the Mariners 49.7 more wins than a replacement player would give for his club. I also know how to calculate some of  the unimportant/useless statistics like Catcher's ERA (a.k.a. Pitch Framing), which means how much value a catcher is at calling the game for his team's pitchers. However, the legendary Bill James once said that "while it is possible that catchers may have a significant effect on a pitching staff, there is too much yearly variation in Catcher's ERA for it to be a reliable indicator of ability.". So I rarely use that one. I also know that the Seattle Mariners need to keep young ballplayers and not trade them to east coast teams like Boston, Tampa Bay or New York, as young players are baseball's best natural resource. Why were the Mariners were so good in the mid 1990s to early 2000s? They stocked the farm system with young players and had an incredible scouting department! Which is what I want to do, plus, young players get more recognition if they win together and the more recognition the players get, the more popular the team they are on becomes over time, which increases fan attendance, which increases the $$$ flow for the owners and then everyone's happy and that's all I want to do is to make everyone happy. http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/joey-parkhill-for-seattle-mariners-gm-job

The Mariners playoff game I missed [because of my mother]

On October 6, 2000, the Seattle Mariners played the Chicago White Sox at a sold out Safeco Field (yes the Mariners have sold out games other than Opening Day/Night). The Mariners won that game on a beautiful drag bunt by Carlos Guillen, but that's not the point of this entry!  My mom was there, so was my Aunt Carmen, my Uncle Ben and his best friend Tom Treese. Where was I? I was at school, crying on the inside because my mom wanted me to get an education at an elementary school where I was picked on because of my Autism and they had no special education program, whatsoever. Not that I'm bitter or anything... 

Here is that beautiful bunt by Carlos Guillen...

2000 ALDS SEA VS. CHW 

Luckily, this has a happy ending, I have recently bought a DVD set containing this playoff game in it's entirety. The added bonus is that you also have the option of listening to the Mariner's radio broadcast with the late, great Dave Niehaus & Rick Rizzs.

P.S. I love you Mom

Montreal Expos Follow-Up Story

Bonjour! This is a follow-up story to an entry from March. In 1985, the Montreal Expos outdrew the New York Yankees in fan attendance, I will say it again: The Montreal Expos outdrew the New York Yankees in fan attendance! Some people say it was because the Yankees were one of the worst teams in baseball in '85 and it wasn't because Montreal loves baseball. Here's my problem with that statement: Montreal IS a sports town, they love their sports teams and they care what happens to them. You think I'm lying? 97,000 people showed up at Olympic Stadium for an exhibition game between the Toronto Blue Jays & the New York Mets. They love baseball in Montreal. They are the Canadian equivalent of Seattle Seahawks fans! There has got to be one MLB exec who is thinking "Why are we not in Montreal?" & I hope it's New Commissioner Rob Manfred, who has announced MLB is open to expansion or relocation.